Wednesday, March 14, 2012

If I Knew Then What I Know Now

If you could go back to right before you had your baby with Down Syndrome what would you tell yourself?"  It got me thinking about the question what would I tell myself if I knew then what I know now. I would say that something is about to happen to you, to your family, something that you are not prepared for but it is going to be okay, it is going to be fine. A wonderful little girl is about to enter your life and she is going to make it a brighter more loving place to be.  I would tell myself I know you are scared, I know you blame yourself and it is okay to feel these things but know deep down that God chose you to be this little girl's mommy for a reason, he knows you are strong and loving and will be there for her no matter what. She needs you, she needs your love, she needs your help, she needs you to just love her, love her for who she is not for who she was supposed to be or may never become. I would say she is not what you expected, she is so much more.  She is going to teach you things about life that you took for granted or never understood before.  She is going to teach you how to appreciate life and how to love. I would tell myself that because of this little girl you are going to be a better person, more giving, more caring, more loving.  You are going to be all that you can be all because of her. She is going to be s joy to your family. She is going to make your family stronger.
Don't be scared she is going to get through the heart surgery and amaze everyone.
She is going to amaze you with how much she can do.  She will do so much more than the experts tell you she will do. I would tell myself that I am stronger than I know and that she is stronger than I can ever imagine and we will all be alright. I would tell myself that you will love this baby girl more than you can possibly imagine.  She will teach you to love better to hug harder and kiss longer.  She is going to change your whole world as you know it and make it even better.  You will appreciate how precious life is.  The road ahead might be scary because there is so much more that is unknown but don't worry about what you don't know, just love her and she will love you back.  Enjoy life in this very moment, enjoy each one as they come and cherish them.